Where Sin Runs Deep, Grace Runs Deeper

When asked to share my testimony of what God has done and shown me on team, it was almost overwhelming to think of how to fit everything He’s taught me into a small paragraph. I think there is one overarching theme though that God has made evident to me the majority of my time on team, and Aaron summarizes it well in a phrase he often uses: “We will never truly know the depths of our sin, how deep that rabbit hole truly goes. But where our sins are many, His mercy is so much more.”

It has been a prayer of mine that God would help me to love better and deeper than I’ve loved before. And He has answered that prayer, but not in the way I had expected. I had anticipated being shown new ways to love, learning more about the people around me so I could serve them better, and for God to give me wisdom in knowing how to become closer with the people that God has placed in my life. However, instead of God predominately showing me “new heights” of how to love people, He has shown me how insufficient and conditional my love for others truly is. I can be so blind to my own selfishness, so much so that even the kind and thoughtful acts I do can have tainted motives. I have so many idols that I constantly worship without even realizing it. When I look at my life and mirror it with the love of Jesus, I don’t even come close. Jesus loves unconditionally, eternally, and perfectly. The more I look at the character of Jesus, the more my sin is fully displayed.

​​While that can be discouraging and disheartening, there is also great encouragement and joy in knowing that truth. Despite my sinfulness and inadequacy to love people as I should, God is committed to chipping slowly away at me until I look like His Son. If there is one thing that team has taught me, it’s this: God is so much greater than I am in every conceivable way, and yet He is faithful to use a broken vessel like me for the good of other people and His glory. So, I let Him chip away at me through heartaches, trials, and mistakes, knowing that the image God is turning me into is far greater than anything I could possibly dream or think of. Praise God for the work He does in the life of His people!

As a small tribute to end, I want to thank the entire team for the crucial role they’ve played in my life. God uses people to change us into His image, and I will forever be indebted to the people on this team who have helped shape me into the person I am now. Through laughter and tears, God has given to me a group of people that I now call family, and their impact on me will last far into the future. Thank you for loving me and investing in me. I love you all, and I will miss you dearly when I leave this team.